I saw a big church building up for sale over the weekend and it got me thinking again about why churches seem to be emptying. I think one of the ways church has lost it today is by getting entangled in an obsession with morality. No one wants to go near the church because they often have such strange rules.
For example:
Some churches will frown on you if you drink alcohol. It doesn’t say you can’t in scripture; it just says don’t get drunk because it leads to bad decisions and problems. But who wants to hang around in a church that deals in guilt over things like that.
Some churches will reel in horror if you use ‘colourful language’, but did you know that when Paul says that he ‘considers all things rubbish when compared with the greatness of knowing Christ’, he uses the Greek word ‘Skubula’, which is a far cruder word than ‘rubbish’? It actually closer approximates the word ‘shit’ in our day and age, which, lets be honest, good Christians just don’t say.
Some churches get really weird about romantic relationships. You have to ‘declare your intentions’ to the Elders of the Church before you are approved to ‘court’. Then you have to share everything you’re doing with each other in an open and ‘accountable’ relationship. All this because we don’t trust people to act like adults in relationships and make their own choices, so we want to control out the possibility of someone making what we think we would be a mistake.
I was once part of a church where I was told it was a sin to have my hair as long as it was! Did they think Jesus’ walked sporting a military buzz cut?
It’s no wonder people aren’t lining up at the doors. Now that makes some Christians feel proud and exclusive but it leaves me feeling ashamed that we’re keeping so many from God because of our strange moral standards. Where do we get them?
It’s funny that other ‘sins’, churches don’t seem as fussed with, like gossip and malicious talk, and not caring for the needy (which Jesus suggests in Matthew is worthy of hell!) Those we don’t worry about so much. But drinking, smoking, swearing, and ‘sexy stuff’ are very, very important to God, if you believe the church. They are the really bad ones. You think the rest of the world can’t feel this weird bias? So why do we choose these over others to target and get anal about?
I have a theory that over the last 200 years or so the church has become more interested in protecting Edwardian Morality than it has in what Scripture says. Over time we mixed up being ‘Western’ with being ‘Christian’. I think a lot of what we nag people about in church is ‘good old English morals’. In the Western Church we’re trying to support our antiquated ideas of what it means to be a good citizen, and we’re twisting or adding to Scripture to do it.
For example, find me the place in scripture where it says people can’t smoke. “Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit” (1 Corinthians 6)? Nice try. Then why don’t we come down on people who over eat? Why the emphasis on smoking?
Find me where in scripture it speaks about how physical you can get with your romantic partner. Its just not there. I don’t mind that you think its a good idea to set boundaries for yourself, but can we just acknowledge that these are western cultural issues, not biblical ones.
We seem to think that being a Christian means having good manners and behaving in a demure way. I’m afraid thats not very compelling. It sounds boring, and thats how most of our churches look to anyone watching; like a list of things we shouldn’t do.
And that’s a big problem: that instead of pushing people towards the positive, we seem desperate to keep them away from a narrow list of negatives. Churches preach more about what they stand against, than showing the world what they stand for. Paul spoke over and over again about the freedom there is in following Jesus and about how antithetical the legalistic approach of the Jews was. But lets be honest; the vast majority of churches today feel more like the latter than the former. To someone looking in from the outside this isn’t something they would want to subject themselves to voluntarily. We must feel like a cult with a set of very strange lifestyle choices which few members can actually back up, other than saying, “Well my Pastor says we shouldn’t do that.” It has always frustrated me how few Christians read the scriptures for themselves to find out what they really say about how to live well.
The way we carry on, we wouldn’t even have accepted Jesus, because He wasn’t well behaved enough. Hanging out at ‘shady’ parties over the weekend. Arguing with religious authority. Bringing His prostitute and beggar friends to church. Forgiving the people we want to stone as a group. Throwing stuff around because He didn’t like the way we ran our church. (which is why when people ask me to be more Christ-like in my criticism of institutional church, I tell them to check their bibles to find out just what they’re asking.) Jesus didn’t have good Victorian Morals at all! I’m not sure many churches would have Him, but its only because He doesn’t fit our stupid little list.
So I, for one, vote the list gets looked at again. This very narrow list of naughty things is the worst possible working definition of ‘sin’. The best theory I heard about ‘sin’ was that ‘sin’, in its essence, is ‘selfishness’. ‘Sin’ is really those times when we make things about ourselves! We’re called to live from a different place. Paul says that ‘he (Paul) no longer lives, but its Christ who lives in him’. He also says that we’re to ‘die to self’. Now
I can see loads of ways every day where I live out of selfishness, and need a kick in the ass. All of a sudden ‘the list’ seems really trivial.
I think it got going when western missionaries went into African villages, telling them all about Jesus, and then telling them to give up their second and third wives because its a sin! Before you knew it, indigenous cultures had been wrecked, and tribes people where attending the hastily erected little missionary church in three piece suits, because ‘to be Christian, is to be a good westerner’.
My opinion: I don’t think it matters how many wives they had. The only thing that matters is connecting others with God. If He wants to change things after that, as they live out of Christ rather than their own selfishness, He can communicate it them on His own. He did with me.
Unfortunately, we haven’t moved very far. For example; how many people feel welcome in church if they live with their girlfriend? They don’t, because they know that to get to know anyone, they will have to have that awkward conversation where they are told how ‘evil’ they are for ‘living in sin’. No one will volunteer for that kind of treatment.
What about instead, having a church that just thinks that connecting people with God is the important thing, and trusting Him to take care of the rest, even if it doesn’t look like your western ideal, or agree with your churches list on every point?
Now some of you will be panicking that I’m just saying, ‘Anything goes. Its all relative.’ I’m not at all. I am getting more stuck into the Bible more than ever. But what is standing out for me is not how restrictive it is, but how much legalism we’ve added to it to support our weird modern church culture.
It makes me mad.
This isn’t an easy road; to live from this place without ‘the list’. It will actually be a far more spiritually disciplined life because it will mean being aware 24/7, living out Christ, rather than our own selfish desire. Constantly point our lives at the positive, instead of just away from our small list of negatives. We’ll treat others well. We’ll meet others needs. We’ll share God with others in ways that make sense, and we’ll bring the Kingdom to earth in a hundred different ways every day. It will no longer be good enough to carry a figurative reminder card around, telling us not to drink, smoke, swear or kiss anyone!
Brilliant post Sean – once again nailed it on the head.
I second your vote, unfortunately I have a feeling that it is too far gone for even a re-look. The ‘Church’ as we know it is dead in my mind, lost its way long ago.
Recently bumped into an old friend who I haven’t seen in a while – he has started a home church in his lounge every Sunday morning, no pastor or priest (which some would find shocking and I would guess even claim you cant call that a church) just a couple of people who sit around and have a discussion lead by someone different every week.. hey isn’t that what a cell group in meant to be? sigh..sometime we get so close yet end up so far….
Hey Sean,
I completely agree that focusing on the sin before connecting people to God is pointless and ultimately useless. Our relationship with Jesus, our intimate contact with the Spirit, our heart crying out to the Father, these are our only salvation. Without this connection to God we don’t even know what sin is, never mind trying to do anything about it.
That said, I don’t necessarily think that acknowledging that certain attitudes and/or actions keep us from connecting more fully with God is a bad thing. What I would suggest is that we explain more!
Why is smoking a “sin”. And while I like the sin is selfishness approach, I think I prefer an approach that views sin as something that blocks my connection to God or my ability to hear, see or feel God, my ability to follow him, my ability to receive his grace and healing.
Smoking is a sin for the same reason that eating to much is a sin and for the same reason that many other self-damaging behaviour is a sin. It keeps us from God. It creates addictions, illness, distraction and any number of other elements that keep us from God. God desires that we live fully in Him and anything – fill in the blank – that keeps us from entering more fully into that relationship is sinful.
I can probably make a longer list than most churches – in part because i’ve sinned so much – but I now know WHY those things are unhelpful in connecting with God. I know the reasons why living with your girlfriend is problamatic, how easily addictions form and how deceptive certain sins are in their cunning distractfullness.
In large part I think the church is simply trying to save people from making some of the same mistakes they have made. I think that unfortunately the church suffers from the same disease that our parents suffered from when we were growing up…
Son: Mom can I go out tonight?
Mom: Where are you going?
Son: To Marks house.
Mom: Will his parents be there?
Son: uh…i think so.
Mom: Son, will his parents be there.
Son: Okay…No, they won’t [yeah right, like we actually confessed!].
Mom: No, you can’t
Son: WHY!!!
Mom: Because I Said So and that’s Final!
The church is quite correct – although i agree, often quite biased – in their condemnation of certain practices. It’s the WHY that I usually find is missing. Don’t do it because it is sinful doesn’t quite cut it.
When Jesus stops the crowd of people from stoning the woman caught in adultery his last words to her are “go and sin no more”. She already knew why it was keeping her from connecting with God, Jesus didn’t need to tell her. But this is not always the case. Just look at Paul’s rebuke of the Corinthians:
It is actually reported that there is immorality among you, and immorality of such a kind as does not exist even among the Gentiles, that someone has his father’s wife.
You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead, so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst.
For I, on my part, though absent in body but present in spirit, have already judged him who has so committed this, as though I were present.
In the name of our Lord Jesus, when you are assembled, and I with you in spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus,
I have decided to deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of his flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough?
Clean out the old leaven so that you may be a new lump, just as you are in fact unleavened. For Christ our Passover also has been sacrificed.
Therefore let us celebrate the feast, not with old leaven, nor with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.
I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people;
I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world.
But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler–not even to eat with such a one.
For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church?
But those who are outside, God judges. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES.
It is clear here and in other passags that Paul considers sin a very serious issue, one that keeps us from the fullness of life in Christ. But Paul goes to great length in his writings to try to explain to people why these practices and attitudes distract and keep us from intimacy with the Trinity.
Perhaps at times the Bible uses language and examples that may seem foreign to Christians today. It is therefore those of us who teach who need to translate a text written 2000 years ago into language and contexts that people can understand today.
Sadly however I think that sin is often downplayed in our modern worldview. We’ve forgotten WHY sin was such an issue that Jesus had to DIE to remedy it. Perhaps if we started explaining more, not simply telling people that the consequences of sin is death, but actually explaining how that death occurs, little by little day by day until we are finally and eternally seperated from God. Perhaps then we wouldn’t simply have lists of do’s and don’ts, but actually well informed Christians making solid decisions based on their desire to draw closer to Jesus.
dude. i’m gonna comment here.
i think that the western world has made such a balls-up and still continues to do so. in fact, you’ve done it a couple of times in our own blog posts. the glory of the Church, against which the gates of hades cannot prevail is an awesome and planet-shaking truth, but we seem to have become so obsessed with small localized arms of the Church that we have watered down and continue to water down a revolutionary Gospel to be some piss-warm afternoon tea!
why are we so obsessed with arms and legs of the Church. of course the Body will have an injured arm or an infected chest or a bruised vertebra from time to time. that’s to be expected – it is a Body after all. but that’s the glory of the Body, in that when one arm is lame, there is another to lay it’s hand on it and pray for its healing.
there are many parts of the Body that are suffering as a result of created borders and boundaries that restrict their direct supply of Living Waters. further to this, i think that there have been many sproutings of other arms from already lame areas of the Body and this has created communities plugged into a powerless gospel – which Paul says is no gospel at all – and when we lose the Truth of the Gospel, we then begin to doubt the power of the Lord, so we start creating moral standards of control, “just in case God is not in control.” and i feel pity and pain for those leaders who deny the power of the Gospel and lead whole communities in that fear.
but does the Church have a problem? or, as Daniel has said above, is “the Church as we know it” dead?
i think if we continue to view the Church through our misguided lenses then we really do have a problem. not the Church, but us. why do we not focus more on the Church and less on the various churches? if we focused more on the Church, then we would walk in perpetual victory. by focusing on our own localized churches, we end up walking in frustration, anger, loss, confusion and everything else that we are not created to walk in.
bottom line: if anyone’s church – which is only a tiny finger of the Church – is preaching anything else other than the Gospel, or if you find that they are denying the power thereof, we are commanded not to fix it or debate it or ponder it, but simply to turn away. let’s stop debating powerlessness and trying to see how to fix it. let’s turn away and start afresh. it only takes two or three and if we are faithful to the Word, then God will add to us.
Part of the problem that I think you are wrestling with is that “the church” has come to mean an organisation, a building, a set of rules, a hierarchy … almost anything but a free association of people trying to lead a better life (what ever that may mean) and figure out ‘what its all for’, by trying to understand what ‘god’ might be like through a study and emulation of the life and teachings of Jesus.
As to this post: “Goes without saying.” Of course. Stands to reason.
Solid. Yet another call for us to say, do, and think about what really counts – what Jesus did and said.
Insightful (and painful) observations about church. I kept picturing people’s faces if I lit up a cigarette before introducing this Sunday morning’s first worship song. Shock tactics, Tony Campolo style.
We recently advertised an Alpha drinks and snacks evening with a display in church, and there were some grumblings about having a can or two of Castle Lager as part of the advert in the foyer of church. The lounge or dining room would be okay though. After mid day of course
I think it was Common Ground Church who set up a stall advertising their marriage course at the recent Sexpo at the CTICC. I’m sure they got flak for that. But good one them – THAT’S the kind of thing Jesus would have done. Guerrilla-ministry at it’s best!
You’re spot on in so many of your observations – when I think about it, there are a LOT of ‘churchy’ cultural expectations I’ve grown up with that I couldn’t really see in the Bible. For me it was things like long hair, wearing your pants low (i was a sk8er b0i), going to night clubs (actually thought that was lame anyway), listening to heavy rock bands, etc.
I’ve always loved tattoos, and have been seriously contemplating getting a fairly large piece inked recently, but I keep thinking about the consequences with people I love who would get upset about it. I respect them, and want to maintain the good relationships there. But I don’t see tattoos the same way they do. Perhaps one day I’ll just go for it.
A friend who is a priest, counselor, and OT scholar talks about his frustration with ‘limp-wristed’ Christianity – faith that seems to have no substance, no passion, no appeal. Christians who’ve substituted the demanding, unpredictable adventure of following Jesus with a sheltered, disconnected, introverted, quiet, meek, and pretty bland existence.
As a parent I wrestle a lot with the concept of isolating vs educating, something that you seem to touch on. My love for my little girl means I don’t want to see her placed / walking into situations that I know have led to painful experiences for others. Yet part of my responsibility is to teach her to see the truth and choose wisely in life. Nikki and I are a great match for each other, we balance our approach out because we see things differently at times.
I recall that Jesus warned very sternly about causing children to sin (going for a swim with a millstone around your neck…). I reckon that applies to adults too. Paul says something about not causing others to stumble / fall into sin.
The faith that we model and teach others has to lead them away from sin and towards Jesus’ way of doing things. If our leadership encourages them to live in a way that sooner or later draws them into some form of sin, we’ve done the opposite of helping. It’s unwise to assume that every person is going to withstand temptation to the same degree, or be able to fully understand / embrace the bigger picture.
But the converse applies too – if we teach people to avoid something without being able to explain why, we’ve failed to guide them properly, and we may just be putting words into Jesus’ mouth that aren’t there.
Here’s what I take away from this week’s post:
1. Know what is sin in God’s eyes, and what is merely dangerous for us
2. Teach people WHY certain situations and lifestyles can lead them away from God
3. Don’t press ‘Enter’ when typing in the ‘Name’ field or WordPress thinks you’re trying to post nothing and get’s upset with you.
Thanks Sean. Your last paragraph is an inspiring picture I will keep with me.